Out of touch

I got some very good news yesterday. The sat-nav or TomTom belonging to my parents-in-law arrived back safely to them in the post. Phew.

My parents-in-law had generously lent me the sat-nav after I/we asked to borrow it. When we asked, my father-in-law's face flashed concern - my husband pushed the point by saying, 'I think it would be a massive help to us and a safety issue for my wife' so father in law graciously capitulated, though I am sure, not without reservations. My husband and I have a bit of a track record of being forgetful and chaotic.

This year my husband went back to Nairobi earlier than me so I hired a car for my last week, criss-crossing the country with the help of Tom tom. I loved having my own wheels and particularly enjoyed disobeying the sat-nav at times. 'Turn around' he said, then, 'At the first opportunity, turn around' - After that I would blat on and the machine would have to hastily reconfigure the route. It was lots of fun and got me through London, up to Northamptonshire, (straight to John Lewis in Milton Keynes), down to Wiltshire then most importantly back to the no-mans-land of car hire returns at Heathrow airport at 7am on Sunday morning. However, this is when my troubles began.

I had carefully weighed the parcel in advance and got the right stamps. I knew that there was a postbox at Heathrow, so felt confident about popping the sat-nav in - though it would mean that I would not be able to send it 'registered mail'. The problem was that at the airport, I found that the postbox would only take letters. After a bit of pushing and jamming I discovered that there was a metal plate in it to prevent parcels being dropped in. With my 3 children (one of them pushing a heavily laden trolley, me pushing another) we went to information.

'you could get a taxi to Terminal 3, I THINK there is a post office there' she said, adding, 'but I can't guarantee it will be open.'
'No Time' I said,
'Try excess baggage' she said, 'they have a courier service'

I went to excess baggage,
'it will cost you £80' the unconcerned man said. I tutted.
'can't you just take it to the nearest postbox for me?'
'no' came the reply. He was busy plastic wrapping suitcases for another more compliant customer.

Next I tried the Taxi desk.
'well, you could try to ask one of our drivers to do it' the man said, 'but they will probably say no.'

Hell I thought. By this time, my eldest daughter who was pushing the second heavy trolley said,
'Mum, do we have to worry about this now? Can't we just get on the plane please?'
I ignored her, instead resolutely saying, 'this way' and we went back out of the automatic doors heading for the taxi rank.

Halfway between the double doors, my eldest daughter ran over my youngest and a couple of suitcases fell off. The screams of my 4 year old brought about a turning point.

A sympathetic construction worker in a hard hat and luminous jacket (presumably working on Terminal 4's current refurbishment program) stopped to try to help.
'Where are you going?' he fatefully asked - and I told him the whole story - then foisted the parcel on him.
'I don't suppose that you could post this for me could you?' I explained what was inside.
'But, for all you know I could just keep this?' he said,
'I know, but I'm sure you won't' I replied. I was beginning to look like an unglued mother.

He doubtfully took it and I walked away with a million thank yous. We got in the lift up to departures then joined the Kenya Airways queue. A few minutes later my new best friend was back.
'I'm sorry,' he said, 'I just can't take this.'
'Oh no!' I exclaimed.
'It's just that it's an electronic device, I don't really know what's in here and if it's found in my locker I could get in an awful lot of trouble.'
'I understand,' I said, 'but I could open it and show you couldn't I?'
before he could reply I was unravelling the parcel and pulling out the sat-nav -
'you see, that's all that is inside'
'I don't know' he said again.
By this time I was bullying the poor man.
'You've seen it now - I'm sure it will be fine.'

He walked away and I had sort of made sure he still had the parcel with him. I felt a bit sick about being so mean, but felt I didn't really have another option.

When I got on the plane me husband wrote a text message saying don't worry, just bring the parcel with you and we can give it to a friend in Nairobi who is going to England in a few days.

When we got home, my friend said to me, 'you really have lived abroad for too long. I can't believe you begged a complete stranger in Heathrow to take a parcel containing an electronic device that for all he knew could have been a bomb.' Oh dear I thought.

It's true. We have been away too long. We went to a very good friend's christening and I was the only one wearing a shiny dress that was certainly more 'London wedding' than 'country christening'. A Diane von Furstenburg jersey wrap dress would have been more fitting (not that I have one). I even heard a fellow godparent in the church say - 'Oh, so you want me to sit next to the one in the smart dress'. I think I blushed. After the service I hastily threw on a denim jacket to tone down the look (I had already discarded the shiny diamante necklace after the first 5 minutes, begging my daughter to loan me her rather more conservative necklace!). My husband was having a parallel panic about his new slip-on shoes being too 'spivvy' and pointy compared to the 'Churches' lace-ups that everyone else was wearing. Help, we are in the fashion wilderness and can never go back!

Acacia House children's home

The day before we left to go to England, I visited Acacia House with a friend. They now have seven children resident, with a capacity for 20 - so it's growing slowly. Their garden or rather 'shamba' has become a sort of flourishing organic farm with, among other things, cabbages the size of bowling balls! There's spinach, tomatoes, chilli peppers, courgettes. Chickens too. Tons of food to feed everyone and some even left to sell on.

The kids looked very happy. Inside the house still feels a little echoing and cold, though there is some furniture and curtains. In my view it could do with a big rug, a TV and a couple of sofas to warm up the living room a bit. I'll probably mention this next time I see Liz, but I'm sure that she and Stu are fed up with nosey-parkers like me putting in my tuppence worth of advice over how to run the place and what to do. As far as I understand it, they are starting slowly and want to keep the place at a 'grass roots' type level - I'm sure that they would love sofas too but are very conscious of devoting donated funds to food and school fees etc. without spending frivolously.

The reason for the visit was that my school-run friend, an expat mum who is reluctantly leaving Kenya to move to pastures new (following her husband to Europe), was giving Acacia House her old car. It's a rattly old 5 door Suzuki Vitara, quite like the one I had when I first moved to Africa. The electric windows don't really work, the bonnet is faded grey rather than black and the paint work bubbling up. It has various quirks but apparently the engine is sound. Liz and Stuart were delighted to have a car. They have always had concerns about how to get help if an emergency situation were to arise - you see they are at least a 15 minute walk from the main road and the nearest bus stop.

I will miss seeing my friend beetling up and down the road to our local kindergarten in that car. She has been in Nairobi for as long as we have and we used to chew the fat over numerous cups of tea, with our babies crawling around our ankles for years on end. She was famous for her kind and generous nature and her milk tart! - always on the end of the phone, somebody who made time for other people. When we visited the children's home, my friend was crying. She was overwhelmed by the thought that she was leaving so soon and also that her car was going to such a good place.

A friend of my husband in England said that he and his wife have set up a direct debit to Acacia House to sponsor a child. There are details on how to do this below. In the meantime, I will be seeing Liz and Stu again over the next month and will keep you updated.


Sponsor the Girls of Acacia House:

Dear Friends & Family-

We wanted to take this opportunity to thank you for your support. Acacia House has come a long way since opening a little over six months ago, and it is through your generosity that this has been possible.

As we look to the future, we have many hopes for the home. Currently, the girls we have are thriving, however there are still many challenges ahead. For Acacia House to sustain and grow we are in need of ongoing support.

We have started a Sponsorship Program, the purpose of which is to provide continuous assistance for the girls’ education and basic needs. With your help, Acacia House will be able to see the girls through their childhood and schooling, ensuring their future.

There is much poverty and need in the world, and we urge you to consider making a commitment, and joining us in helping these Kenyan children. A small sacrifice every month can make a huge difference.

Sponsorships start at as little as $30 and are tax deductible in both the US and Australia. As a sponsor, you will receive special updates and photographs of the girls and the home, as well as additional material upon signing up – it’s easy, just click the link below.

Please take a moment and think about becoming a sponsor. If you already have, thank you. We would also greatly appreciate you forwarding this to your friends, family and anyone else who might be interested.

Again, thank you for supporting Acacia House.

Liz, Stu & the Girls


www.acaciahouse.org/sponsorship.html


Donation information for the US*
Credit Card: Please go to www.acaciahouse.org/support.html

Direct Deposit: Global Development Group USA Inc, Routing # 263179804, Savings Account # 3959950, Memo/Reference: J518 Acacia House
Check: Please make out to "Global Development Group USA Inc", write “J518 Acacia House” in the memo line and post to: Global Development Group USA Inc, 2314 Longwood Oaks Blvd, Lakeland, Florida 33811
For all US donations please email info@acaciahouse.org with your name, address & donation amount for our records and a receipt.

Donation information for Australia*
Credit Card: Please go to www.acaciahouse.org/support.html
Direct Deposit: St. George Bank, BSB 333-055, A/C #552988416, A/C Name "Acacia House Australia Pty Ltd", Ref “Your Name.” For our records & a receipt, please email australia@acaciahouse.org

Cheque: Please make out to "Acacia House Australia Pty Ltd" & post to: Acacia House Australia Pty Ltd, PO Box 4262, Balwyn East, VIC 3103
*all donations over $2 are tax-deductible to this Global Development Group approved aid & development project

Re-entry - back home after UK leave

We are back. I’m not very good at flipping to England then back to Kenya. I find it unsettling because seeing friends and family and being ‘home’ is too good. My mum said that if we lived in England we would miss Kenya, so you can't win. We were roundly spoiled by everybody, eating, shopping, doing nothing, pleasing ourselves. There are too many goodbyes at the end of it all.

Yesterday my re-entry to Nairobi was the same as usual. The house here felt cold and echoing because we don’t have carpets. Whilst I usually feel our house is cluttered and we have too many things, it suddenly looked bare in comparison to houses in England, with plain walls – not enough colour or pattern. I see damp patches on the ceiling boards, cracks in the wall and tatty rugs with fresh eyes. The initial urge is to renovate or change things. One year in August I bought bits of off cut carpet for our living room to warm it up. Another I splashed out on the dishwasher to bring us up to date with the home.

Yesterday I unpacked six suitcases of stuff; the fruits of frenzied sale shopping. School bags, warm jumpers, pairs of shorts, swimming costumes, t-shirts, trainers, cds. Thank goodness no bags were lost by the airline this time, I wouldn’t have had a clue what was in each one. I’m up to date with extended family and godchildren’s birthday presents to the end of October, all wrapped and posted. I think I now even have our own kids Christmas presents taped. I have been squirreling things away in a high cupboard. After ten years of being an expat, I'm finally learning to think ahead.

I bought a Laura Ashley light fitting this year to go above our dining table. I have never spent money on anything like that before. Gladys and Florence got two pairs of new shoes each. I also realised I had forgotten to buy anything for Shadrack or Jared – last time they got radios, the year before, watches. What shall I do now?

Before putting any newly bought clothes into the children’s drawers, I pulled out old things that were too small (unpacking always becomes a snowball/spring cleaning type of job). For the first time I notice that the old t-shirts and shorts that three weeks ago looked fine, now appear faded, stained and stretched and only fit for the bin. T-shirts have weird brown dots running up the back, rips or splashes of paint that I previously chose not to see.

There was no food in the house so I went to the local supermarket and found that stocks were low, but still managed to fill my trolley to the brim nonetheless. I was brought back to Africa when in the shop I passed an older Kenyan man dressed in a tatty overcoat, clutching an empty basket picking up and putting down small half pint plastic packets of milk, as if torn over whether to take one or not. The lady behind me in the checkout queue stared and stared as I took one item after another out of my basket. She had a giant container of tomatoes and a couple of brown boxes – nothing superfluous. There is currently a sugar shortage and it took me an age to get a canister of gas for some reason.

But beside this, everyone was friendly, greeting one another, smiling, having a joke. It is a massive sweeping generalisation I know, but I thought to myself in the car on the way home; England is all about retail and wanting stuff, keeping up with the latest thing, perhaps an ice making fridge, new clothes for ever variable weather, an i-phone or a flat screen TV - but Africa is more about relationships, making do, hustling and surviving and the rest suddenly doesn’t matter so much does it? I should try to keep this in mind more often - but I still wouldn't mind a new fitted kitchen...!

High maintenance guests

Apologies for long silence. This expat housewife is currently moonlighting in the UK as a rain goddess. Apparently our arrival at the homes of various friends and relatives heralds the coming of torrential rain after long, dry spells and heatwaves.

'Ooo isn't the grass looking green now!' our hosts say.
'Last week it was all brown and dying - amazing what a week of rain can do!'

My eldest daughter looks at me accusingly,
'you only packed 'hot' clothes for us mummy - you said it would be a heatwave!!??'

Our 'one pair of jeans each' policy is not working out well for us. At my mum's house we were making hanging out washing and then bringing it in again half an hour later, into a fine art.

We have not lived in England for so long now (10 years), that it amazes me how changeable the weather can be here. I asked relatives who live in the South East whether it is less wet there than in the South West - (I was secretly doing a mental viability study on moving back home).
'I don't think so' they said 'it's pretty wet everywhere'. The local news is full of army fatalities in Helmand, Afg and Swine flu killing healthy people indescriminately.

We are 5 vagabonds arriving everywhere with oversized suitcases and implicit demands for lorry loads of food to be produced at worryingly close intervals. Staggered breakfasts that linger on, big lunch, kids tea, adults dinner.

Worse, we go shopping every day and keep bringing more rubbish, plastic bags and superfluous rubbish into the mix. When we leave a place, we always leave something behind - but we also want it back - which means a trip to the post office for somebody.

Between shopping trips where I can't resist buying fabulously cheap clothes for us in the summer sales, my mind is constantly ticking through imminent family birthdays - nieces, godchildren, grandparents - but I left my birthday list at home, so remember that I owe presents, only when it's too late! Meanwhile, my children are receiving wonderful, humbling, generous presents from everybody- and I have lost track of who we need to thank.

Mental note - get organised!

Corruption in Government

My husband heard a good line yesterday;

'Corruption is the glue that is holding this Coalition Government together.'

I know that Kofi Annan has set another deadline of August for setting up a local tribunal to try key personalities guilty of organising post election violence - but after so long, I can't see much in the way of decisive action happening. Perhaps leaders are hoping to continue spinning this issue out?

Politicians who we suspect are on the 'guilty' list continue to posture in the local press. Will they ever be carted off to The Hague - and if they are, will the rest of the Government fall down like a house of cards? How much sway does Kofi Annan actually have?

The fear is, that without facing up to what happened in January 2008, the 2012 election is doomed - bound to be corrupt, unfair and blood spilled.